My Schizophrenic Left Toe

If you've been hanging out with me you've probably noticed I've been doing a lot of gymnastics lately. Specifically splits.

This is because the toes on my left foot do not get along with the toes on my right foot. Thus, my  feet must be separated at all times. The farther apart the better.

You see my left big toe has been struggling with schizophrenia for years. Last week he caught a glimpse of Twilight and promptly decided to become a vampire. Team Edward I believe.

All members of the right foot must be destroyed as demonstrated here in this candid picture of my toes.

This is also why I started using extra long strides to walk. As strange as it may look, I have benefited greatly. Team Edward can no longer attack Team Jacob. More importantly, I am constantly lunging and now have buns of steel.

The lesson I have learned is to put a positive spin on the negative things that happen in life. A schizophrenic left toe, for instance, just might be the boost you need to get back in shape.